I Plead the 5th (Guilty)

I Plead the 5th(Guilty)

          Have you ever been in a situation where you've fallen to the point of no return? When you've hit rock bottom and never thought you would make it back up. You've felt useless and unworthy to be alive. Have you ever been in a situation were you just want to end your life because you know you're guilty and there is nothing that you can do to change that?

          Being guilty of doing something that is so shameful is one of the worst things that will never leave you. ADDICTION leads to guiltiness. I had a family member that was addicted to drugs. His first time using drugs was in high school and that is where it all started. First marijuana then gradually progressed from crystal meth to crack cocaine. It was a once a week routine then became an everyday obsession. He had gotten married to this wonderful, loving, caring, adorable, God fearing woman. She had never knew of anything in the beginning thought he was a good guy, but little did she know it was going to be thirty plus years of hell before he changed his ways. He had put his family in debt, cheated on his wife and left his kids with no father. The last time he had left he thought that that was the point of no return for him. He had stole money from the church left for a week, rented a motel and bought all the drugs he could to have that satisfaction.

          In that time period he had felt so low and unworthy that he was getting ready to kill himself. He thought that if he could overdose it was be an easy death, but realized that he had used all his drugs and ran out of money. At that time he had left the motel and started walking onto this busy street. He started thinking if I just walk into the middle of the street and get hit by a car ill be done away with. As he was getting ready to go, he felt something tug him back onto the sidewalk he said it was an angel and God letting him know that his time is not yet come. He started crying to God about what he had done and felt his guiltiness come upon him. He had received a text message from his son saying, "Dad I love you! why are you doing this? Please come back home."

          Right then and there he knew God still cared for him and had great plans for him. This man that I am talking about is my Father. Today he is doing wonderful, full of Gods love. If it was not for my mother and God he would have been dead along time ago. He is a year and six months clean and doing better than ever.

          Remember even you think that your done and there is no way that you can return. When you have hit rock bottom just have faith wait upon God because he will never leave you nor forsake you. Sometime we go through rough times to become a stronger person. You've got what it takes!